[jesse] -- am i not pretty enough?

[Kyler Rea Urban]

I'll be your medicine if you'll
save me from myself.

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A light, gentle breeze woke her that morning, and it was very early indeed. She smoothed the covers away around her, making the tiny bed before she inched her way to the shower. "Might as well get up if all I'm going to do all morning is roll about..." she said aloud to her reflection, covered in black from yesterday's mascara and eyeliner. She yawned and turned the water on, changing the temperature to fit her personal needs. This made her feel a little better, being able to control at least a tiny part of her daily life, and this is around the point she decided that a day at the beach was something she had been subconsciously craving all along.

The air around her thickened with heat, and she climbed in after stripping of the pajama's she had worn to bed. The water crawled over her soft skin, moistening her pores and awakening her senses. Bathing was never a strenuous task for her, having only a half hour of bathroom time for herself she usually looked thrown together at school, but today her room mates were fast asleep, and now she could take the time she wanted. Shampoo and conditioner smelling over lavender and vanilla, she felt a lot better knowing the simple things in life could still be counted on... even if it were only the scent of her bathroom toiletries.

After she had spent nearly an hour in the small shower stall, she chose a simple pair of blue jeans and a blue tank top just for the occasion. She also slipped a denim jacket over her shoulders because today was going to be a chilly one. Now, she felt like it would be a grand time to dust off her old sketch book and oil pastels from the hope chest that stood at the foot of her bed. The hinges creaked noisily when it opened, and two of her room mates stirred in their sleep, but didn't wake up. She bit her lip and grabbed the items from the oak chest and allowed the lid to close.

Slinking down the hall, she slipped a pair of simple sneakers on her socked feet and continued down the stairs. The front door was locked, but she clicked the deadbolt to the right and then on her way out she locked the door again behind her, slipping the key back into her front pocket. The breeze felt nice against her exposed skin, and she let her eyes close slightly as she walked. The air was clear and crisp, an odd thing to see in this city. Her coat was flittering about in the breeze and it made her feel like she could fly. Then, the sands of the beach came into view.

The wind picked up when she got into the vast space of sand by the ocean, and the way the beach looked, she could be here all day drawing. She smiled slightly, choosing her spot to be seated that morning... and it's where she stayed through the afternoon and well into the evening. People came and went, but nothing really phased her until she saw a familiar face. "Hey, Jess..." she screamed, the wind blocking out her voice. She gathered her things and made herself comfortable next to the male, taking his cigarette and stealing a puff before saying, "How's it going, stranger?" before handing the tobacco back to him. The smoke came from her lips and nostrils and trailed out over the ice blue water.

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[Jesse Walker]

Love is old, love is new. Love is all, love is you.




It had been a long, rough night. It all started after work...well, it started during his shift. Two fine girls had came into the cafe and instantly started hitting on Jesse, but it wasn't like he minded. Hell no, they were hot. They invited him to this party at some loft, and that's where it had started. He drank a little too much alcohol, smoked too much weed, and ended up having sex with some girl. When he woke up this morning, he had no idea where he was. All he knew was the ocean wasn't far from him...and his left shoe was missing.

Once he found the shoe, he stole someone's cigarettes and lighter then started the walk to the cool, blue water. Last night's events had gotten him thinking about his life and how he was living. Parties every night, sex with random girls, drugs...It wasn't a good life and eventually all that bad stuff would catch up with him. Now, Jesse thought this a lot. He always wanted to change but frankly, he didn't have the energy to do so. Or the concentration...or motivation...or want. In reality, young Jesse Walker was screwed.

When he reached the sand, he pulled a beanie from his pocket and stuck it over his curly brown hair, trying to hide the fact he didn't shower this morning. He found a nice spot on the sand and sat down, removing the pack of cigarettes from his left pocket, tapping one out then lighting it. The light breeze blew across his skin and he closed his eyes...until he heard his name.

Kyler?

Jesse looked over at the female now seated next to him, starting to say something but there went his cancer stick. He smirked, taking another drag once he got it back. ''So you don't call me or come over for like two weeks then you steal my cigarette. Oh Kyler, where are your manners, baby?'' He chuckled, winking at her then looking around the beach.

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[Kyler Rea Urban]

The pages of her book blew around in the spiral lightly, her hand holding the various pages as still as she could without closing the book entirely. The pastels were in a tin case tucked neatly in her lap along with the book, and a pencil was stuck in her hair lazily to keep it both from getting lost and keeping the hair out of her face. The sunset was indeed very beautiful, and she had captured most of it on paper until it dissolved into a completely different scene and she had to stop and watch. Nature was wonderful like that. Always changing and forever influenced by others.

Her hands were covered in various blues, purples, reds and oranges as she brushed her bangs out of her face as she looked Jesse over for a moment. He looked like hell, but she figured it was from the night's events before. He had the luxury of staying out all night and sleeping all day... and no school. She thought of what it might be like to be so carefree like he was, but she had to keep to her studies in order to become anything in life. For now, her little play dates with Jesse suited her just fine, and the reason she hadn't contacted him pretty silly... now that she thought about it. "I was catching up on some English reading... I was out a few days last week..." she said with a light smile, knowing it sounded like a cover-up instead of the truth it was.

They never really spoke of their lives outside of the little twosome they shared, mostly sex and alcohol was all they really knew about one another... and frankly, it's all she cared about. The feeling of his body against hers made her weak at the knees, and this is all she needed from him. Anything more and they'd probably both explode. She felt she needed to be against him suddenly, and pressed her lips firmly to his. She didn't care his story of where he had been, who he was with when he had done it, and where he was going in the future. For now, all she wanted was for him to be there with her as the sun set, kissing in the sand on Coney Island.

[Jesse Walker]

He adjusted the beanie on his head before leaning back on his elbows, stretching his jeans clad legs out in front of him, crossing his legs at the ankles, finishing off the cigarette before shoving it into the sand, yawning softly. He looked at her, studying her face in the sun set, the way her hair tried to escape from the pencil. He didn't really like her hair up.

''Oh right, catching up on English reading. Wanna know what I did last night? I went to church. Oh, and then I helped at the soup kitchen then after that I adopted five children. I'm a fucking saint, I know." Jesse laughed, winking at her then reaching up to run his hand down her cheek. ''I'm kidding baby. I'll believe you but only this once, okay?'' He let his hand drop, looking towards the sunset.

His mouth opened and he started to say something, but instead he felt Kyler's lips on his, smirking slowly. Well, that worked too. Talking was overrated anyway, right? A hand slid up the back of her neck, pulling the pencil out and letting her hair flow. Much better. He slipped his arms around her thin waist and pulled her closer, kissing her deeper.

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[Kyler Rea Urban]

The wind picked up slightly around the two, her hair flowing around the man's face and brushing his skin gently. The way he called her baby made her heart skip a beat; the butterflies began fluttering about in the pit of her stomach and her emotions ran around in a sort of frenzy. However, she would never tell Jesse that. Their relationship was wonderful the way it was, and she wouldn't want it any other way.

His hands on her body made her feel like she could fly. The skin against skin tingling feeling she never really felt with any other guy, try as she might. Jesse made her feel alive and free, pressed against him wherever they may have been. Today it was the beach, tomorrow it might be the subway... and a week from now it'll be the window booth at the Chinese food place they both loved. You never really knew with Jess, and this is what drove her to coming back. Jesse knew well the power he had over the young girl, no strings attached and the addiction she had for him.

And so, she pressed against him there on the beach, blissfully in lust with him as her lips dissolved into his, their lives joining as one... at least for the time being. Her tongue slid against his, the two playing among the inside of their mouths. She moaned gently, expressing how much she needed him. Her hands played over his belt skillfully, teasing him. He arched beneath her, and she climbed on top of his toned body and her lips hovered over his neck and shoulders. She laughed gently, knowing the effects she was stirring up within him and this was the point she realized her note book was trying to blow away.

"No...!" she screamed, the wind muting her volume almost to half. Her mood changed for a moment, terrified that all her day's hard work would be blown down the beach and lost forever, but she jumped at it just in the nick of time, saving her sketches from the howling of the wind. She sat in the sand cross-legged, cuddling her pad and pastels. She bit her lip and looked over at Jesse. "Maybe we should move this party elsewhere..." she said with a laugh, clinging to her possessions with a child-like grip.

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[Jesse Walker]

Jesse's mouth moved skillfully over Kyler's, his hands moving down her sides slowly to rest of her hips. When he felt her tongue enter his mouth, he smirked, knowing exactly where this was going. His body could already feel it too and god, he wanted it. Bad.

After she moved into his lap, he tilted his head up slowly, letting out a small grunt, fingers working her shirt up. They ran over the smooth skin of her hips, pressing his body up against hers, biting her neck gently in a few spots. He started to get more into it but she moved. Jesse groaned, sitting up a little and watching her.

''Yeah, I agree.'' He smirked, his voice slightly husky. Jess fixed his beanie then stood up, holding his hand down to her before pulling to to her feet. ''Let's go...to my place. Mason is at school so she won't be there...'' He leaned down, stealing a quick kiss before starting to walk, hands in his pockets. ''My car is over here.''

The car was parked in the parking lot of the apartment the party had been at. He unlocked it then looked over at her, grinning.

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[Kyler Rea Urban]

Content with the decision Jesse had made, she gathered her things and began walking with him. At the mention of his sister, she winced slightly. "Ya know Jess... I don't think Mason really likes me..." she said, speaking from her position of dirty looks and messy confrontations in the halls. Pulling her notebook closer to her chest like a secuity blanket, she laid out the facts to him, that being his siter and her really didn't... click. Whether it be that she was sleeping with her brother or they were simply part of different groups in school, they didn't get along. At least, this was the feeling Kyler was getting and Mason made it clear.

She climed into the car on the passenger side, lying her notebook in her lap and crossing her legs comfortably. In reality, she didn't plan on telling Jesse about her relationship with Mason... or lack thereof. She knew that it would make things worse for her if Jesse decided to say anything to Mason, and it was the same thing as signing her own death certificate. But, for some reason she couldn't stop herself, having the worst case of word vomit.

Finally deciding she had said too much already, she tird changing the subject by slipping her jacket off and saying, "Man, it's a little warm in here..." Her voice had changed slightly, looking over at him and then back at the house his car was parked in front of. A few girls were seated on the porth, all of which she didn't recognize... nor the house either. Jesse had indeed come from inside there, and instead of questioning it she slipped the thought to the back of her mind. What he did on his own time was his business, and she didn't care.

[Jesse Walker]

Jesse knew this already. His baby sis wasn't one to keep things to herself nor was she one to fall for silly girls who thought they knew her brother. Just because these stupid girls slept with them, they thought they would do whatever they wanted. She didn't mess with shit.

''Don't worry about Mason. She's tough, yeah, but she won't like...hurt you or anything." He looked over at her, smirking slightly then rolling down the windows, pulling out of the parking lot then leaning over, kissing her in clear view of the girls. Yeah, he knew how to play this game. Make the others jealous, make the one you're with feel wanted. Simple math right there...

He sped off, pulling onto the street then shifting a little, letting his left arm hang out the window. ''How's school going, Ky?'' Jesse switched hands, setting the right one on her upper thigh and smirking.

[Kyler Rea Urban]

The air in the car began to cool down as they started down the road. This made her feel a little better, but she was still uncomfortable about the discussion. "Yeah, I guess..." she said with a shrug, not really wanting to get into a fight over something petty like this. Jesse was one who cared a great deal about his younger sister, and putting her down wasn't any way to get into his bed. She'd make nice with her if need be, but she wasn't making any promises.

His hand on her thigh brough a gentle smirk to her face, biting her lip in thought of what this could possibly mean to him. All guys thought about was sex, and at this point she didn't mind one bit. She adored Jesse when he wanted something she could give him, and often times she'd get a phone call or text from him asking if she wanted to be with him. Never had she rolled out of bed quicker than on those nights. To him, Kyler was a sure thing... and most girls would hate to adorn that title, while she flaunted it. She was needed and craved... who would want anything less?

The smell of the sea water had faded away and they passed the house where she lived. It was more of an orphanage than a real home, but she never told Jesse where she really had lived. Instead, she was one of the daughters whose parents lived up on Elm with the fancy houses and large front yards. She would have him drop her off, and there were times she walked all the way up to the front door with her hand on the knob before he disappeared and she could walk the five blocks home. Ashamed of her past, she kept it well hidden from everyone, even Jesse...

His question of school came as a surprise to her, breaking her inner thoughs of her home and current living arrangements. She knew he could care less of her studies, but decided to humor the both of them with an answer. "It's going..." she said simply, thankful to have something to talk about and bring her thoughts back from her childhood. When she slipped back, she would grow dark and violent. Possible side effects of the medication they had her on to make sure they didn't have another "accident" with her family.

She placed a hand on his and squeezed gently. Jesse had no idea how she relyed on him just... being there for her. He had constituted more to her than just a sure thing on a Friday night, but she never developed enough nerve to tell him so. There were times where she had thoughts of not even telling her future husband her woes. No one deserved to know the evils of the human race... outside of our history books, that is. His apartmet complex came into view, and her whole face brightened. "So, what's the plans for this evening...?" she aked playfully, inching as close to him as she could, their faces only an inch apart.

[Jesse Walker]

Jesse never really understood their relationship from the start. The whole going out then breaking up thing usually causes people to hate each other but with these two it was totally different. Here they were, exes, about to go inside and have sex. His friends praised him for being able to keep a girl like Kyler hooked but in reality, Jesse Walker was hooked on her. Tha had never really happened before and this was a new situation for him. Sure, he had fuck buddies before but after a while he tossed them aside. He felt Kyler would stick around for a while, though, and he liked that.

''Ah, school. The good ol' days. I caused so much shit in that place. I hated all those teacher who thought they knew everything. I could out smart them, though, and that for sure pissed them off." He shook his head, chuckling a little then squeezing her thigh, glancing at her and smirking. His smirk faded though, when he realized she was in a little trance. He caught her doing that sometimes, but let it go, not wanting to ask where she went. That was her business and if she wanted to know, then she would tell him. No pressure.

He turned into the apartment parking lot and stopped the car, looking over at her and coming face to face. ''Well...here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to remove you from this car...carry you upstairs...toss you on the bed then have my way with you. Then we'll eat something, rest for awhile, then do it again. We'll make it an all night event, you know?'' He kissed her slowly for a moment then got out, going to her side and opening the door before pulling her out and into his arms. He picked her up then went inside, starting up the three flights of stairs. They reached the door and he opened it, kicking it shut behind them as he started for the bedroom, kissing her neck.

Jesse's bedroom was a mess, like usual. Clothes littered the floor, along with some blankets and alcohol bottles. He dropped Kyler on the bed before slowly crawling on top of her, catching her lips in his.

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[Kyler Rea Urban]

The way he described things to her was like wacthing a detailed movie, and she loved it. He was very straight forward about everything, not to mention honest. He told it like it was, and this was one of the things she adored about him. The way he worded things left her weak at the knees and melted into his arms. She didn't have much time to respond before Jesse was at her side of the car and flinging her small body over his shoulder. She giggled as he did so, fighting playfully and pounding on his back. She pretended that she didn't like the situation one bit, when in reality she was head over heels for the way he worked.

"Ah, Jess!" she squealed, laughing hysterically as he carried her all the way up to the partment he shared with his sister. She was thankful that Mason wasn't there. It made her plans for Jesse easier, but wouldn't necessarily stop her if Mason was there. Kyler was set in her plans with Jesse. When a girl like her had her mind made up, just try changing it up on her...

Thrown on the bed and laid out gently, she finally settled into the serious mode of sex, biting her lips as Jesse crawled in on top her and she pressed her lips to his. She loved the way he took control of everything, took care of her and made sure she was loving every second the way he was. Her fingers couldn't help but finding his hair and tugging gently. Something about this boy brought the best out of her, and she felt like everything melts away and all there is left was her and this other being. She didn't even mind the mess he had going either.

[Jesse Walker]

Jesse smirked down at her, loving when she pulled his hair. He wasn't one of those sissy guys, hell no. His lips trailed down from hers and onto her neck, his hands working their way up her shirt. He kissed her neck a few times before pulling his head back and pushing the shirt off and to the floor. His eyes looked her over slowly and he smirked, running his fingers over her stomach, taking everything in. ''God, I've missed you.''

With other girls, he would strip them down and just...go. But with Kyler he wanted to take his time. He wanted to touch every bit of her skin, kiss every inch of her. He wanted to give her as much pleasure as possible and he had a record of doing just that. Not to sound too cheesy or anything but her body...was his wonderland.

He leaned up, kissing her cheek then her lips gently, his hands moving down her sides towards her lower half. He skillfully began to undo her pants, getting them unbuttoned before pushing them down her hips and off the bed, onto the floor. He pressed his body against hers, licking his lips.

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